Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
