But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
