...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
