I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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