I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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