theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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