feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
