Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize