She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
You pole danced in your parka.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
