toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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