i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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