When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
