the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
