Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
