i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
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