After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
