Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
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