Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Randomize