We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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