She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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