I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Randomize