My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
