I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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