I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
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