he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
well, you know. whores of a feather.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize