think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
