she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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