My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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