redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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