So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
