She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
