There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
