I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
