And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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