AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
