Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
