somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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