last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I'm gonna fight the coyote
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
