Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I think a kid would responsible me up
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
