I'm drive I can fine osifer
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
