I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
