I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Randomize
