Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
where are my eyebrows?
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