I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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