she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
