ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I met the friendliest cop last night
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
