Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
