I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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