This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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