YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
he fucked my hip out of place.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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